I’M MELTING!!!

Nurse Practitioner: And how is this feeling?

Me: What? My little Lump, my little Lumpkin, my Lumpling?

Nurse Practitioner: Yes. How is it feeling there? Can you feel it getting smaller yet?

Me: Come a little closer.

Nurse Practitioner: Excuse me?

Me: Closer. Lump wants to tell you himself. I call him Lump.

Nurse Practitioner: I don’t understand. Your lump wants to talk to me? It’s “name” is Lump?

She moves closer to my neck, her warm breath causes the skin on my neck to tingle. It was vaguely exciting, strangely hot and intoxicating.

Lump: HEY LADY! ( Channeling his inner Jerry Lewis) I got something to tell you.

Nurse Practitioner: Oh my word, I’ve never heard anything like this before. Or seen anything like it either.

Lump: NURSEY! Feel me. Feel how big I am. This lump is a growing boy. My friends call me Lump, but you can call me BIG BOY.

Nurse Practitioner: Oh Lump, I think I’m falling in love. Talk dirty to me, BIG BOY.

Lump: NURSEY. Hold your cold stethoscope up to me. I have a little message for you and the Doctor.

Nurse Practitioner fumbling with the stethoscope: Sorry, it’s a bit cold.

Lump sneers: Just blow on it, silly. Warm up the scope for me. Show me some love here, How about giving it a little kiss?

Nurse Practitioner: Oh Lump. You little rascal. ( She inserts the stethoscope in her ears, and places the warmed up stethoscope on the lump.)

Lump: I feel something is trying to get under my skin. It started off yesterday after the chemo. I felt woozy, not like I was getting drunk, but like someone was trying to poison me. Then the radiation started. It was like an Uber-Suntanning session, without the SPF.

Then today more radiation.

I felt like a flat dog in a panini press,

Like the furry banana waffles in Gravity’s Rainbow,

I was squeezed fluffy on both sides,

You gave me a numb burning sensation,

Now I’m singing, and I’m singeing,

now it’s getting more painful.

I feel overwhelmed with panic.

I want to scream, but I can’t speak.

My voice is gone.

Less whine, more necrosis.

I’m feel really weird here NURSEY .

I thought you liked me NURSEY.

I thought you were on my side, NURSEY.

I thought we had something here, NURSEY.

A real connection.

And now, the end is here. I face the final curtain.

It’s almost like

I’M MELTING!!!