Are there any girls in this story?

When my daughter was a little girl I would read to her stories before she fell asleep. Some of my most treasured memories come from that magical time, me assuming the role that my own mother had done for me.

One night while reading The Roly Poly pudding by Beatrix Potter for the nth time, I paused for a moment. Then my daughter proceeded to recite word for word the text of the story for almost two pages. I was amazed at her powers of memory.

Another time I began reading to her The Hobbit, a book that I loved as a boy. About four pages in, she looked up at me and asked,

“ Are there any girls in this story?”

I thought about it for a minute. I ran through my memories of the movies, Bilbo, Frodo, Gollum, Gandalf. I vaguely recalled Cate Blanchet and Liv Tyler in the LOTR movies, but I believe they were added in later, not being in the books themselves.

“No. I don’t think there are any girls in this story.”

“We’ll, then I don’t want to hear any more of it.”

“I don’t want to hear stories that do not have girls in them.”

I was stunned for a moment. Stunned at my unwritten bias, stunned by her bluntness, stunned with her strong and clearly stated request.

I was also incredibly proud.

Proud that she was so much her own person. Proud she was not afraid to offend, proud that she was so assertive and definite in her new requirements. It was a learning moment for me, as her father, as a man, as someone who had been given this gift of a child who was confident in her choices and not afraid to give direction.

As she grew into the young woman that she is now, she corrected me many times.

I am thankful for every time. It is important to always be learning. Learning is how we grow and evolve.

It is how we get better.